Tuesday, August 30, 2005

okay, another website. it's a must see. i've added it to my favorite websites.

enjoy! . . . (and try not to be depressed, disillusioned or disuaded from the truth. truth may just some day prevail).

Monday, August 29, 2005

I am no longer homeless. whew! That was a trial.

In case you missed it, three weeks ago i moved to waco. two days later i got a call from fbc austin asking for an interview. two weeks later i started my job. and then i began living out of my car.

my bed, dress clothes and chair were located at sabrina's... my normal clothes, desk, mary kay products and nintendo were in olivia's and my bedroom in the eades house... my computer, backpack, toothbrush and empty crab fish tank were in my car... all the rest of my shiz-ite was stuffed back into the eades garage as it was a year ago. to everything a season and to some things two.

so after anxiously working in the mornings at fbc and then househunting in the afternoons, i finally settled at at house on the eastside (please insert proper vocal inflection and make the 23 symbol with your fingers). i'm living with three other girls, one of whom i know from mosaic (yeah jess!) and one of whom's parents own the house.

so rent is reasonable as was the deposit (unlike EVERYTHING else in austin). I do not have to pay over $700 for a house with an equal deposit and 300 dollar pet fee. again, whew!

obviously, i will not put my address or new home phone number on my blog, so friends, know that i will be emailing it out to you soon enough.

peace out from the eastside...

Tuesday, August 23, 2005

Wednesday, August 17, 2005

I got a job!! Through a Cooperative Baptist Fellowship grant I have been hired as an intern at First Baptist Austin. I will be trying my skills at every area of ministry from children to hospice, from liturgy to retreats. Specifically, I have been hired to create a college ministry. FBC sits downtown, just miles from over 4 colleges and universities, one of which houses the most students of any in the nation. So, they have hired me to go to shows, coffee shops, bars and campuses to talk to students about life, love, god and goodness. does it get much better than that? i'm super nervous, but ready to begin loving and serving this community. "we are god's eyes . . . we are god's hands." thank you blog faithful for all your support over the past year reading my rants and raves. i love you all.

Tuesday, August 16, 2005

s . . . i i i i . . . c . . .k . . .y y y y . . . That's what I would tell my mom if I lived with her right now. I'd put on my best "i'm pitiful" face and tell her I'm sicky. I'd crawl into bed and have her make me hot tea as she would make me gargle salt water. I have a puss pocket on the back of my throat (too much information, I know), and my glands have swolen to the size of large green grapes in my neck. my body aches and all i want to do is sleep.

but i'm not sleeping. michelle gave me a bunch of healthy organic pills to take and some emercenC, and then she told me to gargle with saltwater.

so i'm well taken care of.

i love friends who will listen to you gripe and then lovingly give you what you need. i love falling asleep on their couches at 8pm and having them cover me with a blanket and letting me crash. i love friends who become mothers and mothers who become friends. no wonder they call it community.

Monday, August 15, 2005

No more crankiness. ;) Life is in perspective, and it is good. I am coming much closer to aquiring a job, to being asked to serve, to getting paid. "Praise the Lord oh my soul . . ."

I saw a beautiful chapel today near Driftwood, TX. It had no walls, just open space - beautiful! It made me feel like I was in Israel again. Someday I would like very much to go back.

But in the meantime, I'm here, travelling only to Waco, Austin and back again. And that's enough travelling for this girl right now.

Friday, August 12, 2005

I'm cranky and frusterated today. Do not read further if you want to think nice thoughts about me . . .

Sigh. It is tiring being constantly critiqued by friends and professionals. I'm considering staying at The Buzz for the rest of my life. At least there I am a stellar performer - a fabulous waitress, a hard worker, a welcome smile (unless you're a lazy co-worker in which case you make me sigh and think rude thoughts in my head about you that i will probably share with my manager). It just sucks. How can some people be so screwed up and never admit it or work on it, and it's me who gets shat on with verbal diarhea laced with hypocrasy? please.

Maybe i'll move to canada or switzerland. that sounds like more fun. and the people seem amiable.

In other words, please stop comparing me to other people and just let me be me.

I am not perfect, I am not beautiful, I am not compassionate, I am not patient, I am not pleasant. But I am amazing, I am lovely, I am benevolent, I am persistant, I am charming.

Take the goods and the bads peeps, and for the love of god, will someone just love me?

Friday, August 05, 2005

Another "jorb" update (i'll love you forever if you get the reference!). There are a couple of churches in Austin who are interested in hiring me. No word from Florida, no word from Grand Rapids.

I'm inclined to think that I will be making some big decisions within the next month. So please pray, light a candle or send a pleasant thought to something somewhere with regard to my life. I need discernment with regard to gifts, dreams, and finances.

And thank you for your kind words and prayers already offered over the past year.

Thursday, August 04, 2005

Well, I've done it. Back at the Eades and already life is turning and flip-flopping and i'm leaving kids sitting outside their school for an hour and a half.

Not entirely my fault.

Holly woke me up yesterday morning asking me to take Ben to trumpet camp at 10am. "You need to have him there five minutes early, okay?" Okay. So I set my alarm and went back to sleep.

Ben actually made it to school 9 minutes early, but didn't complain.

So 12:30 rolls around and I wonder when Ben will be returning and how. I have no idea where Holly is today (work, running, the Y . . .) or Abby for that matter (who now has a car). So I call Wes at work wondering if he knows if Ben went home with a friend or when I should expect him or any of the family home.

"You were supposed to pick him up at 11, Ann!"

oops. honestly, i don't remember holly telling me that.

So i rush off to pick up ben, and he greets me with a knowing smile. i apologize profusely, blame his father, and promise him anything he wants for lunch. sonic. and of course i had to get olivia lunch too so she wouldn't be jealous.

so i'm pleased to report that i am back in the swing of things here in wacky waco. $12 in the bank account and $7 of it went to sonic to fix my mistakes. lord. stay posted, more to come i'm sure . . .

Monday, August 01, 2005

I'm in Austin as scheduled. I sit cosily on Sabrina's couch in her house that she hopes to sell. I sit in what seems like silence save the dripping of water in the fishtank which I find very soothing. I do hear sound outside now that I'm conscious of it - Sabrina moving the lawn, the cars on the highway. Is this what it sounded like in the womb?

I think of old friends, of returning to waco to the Eades, to Jessy and Paul, to the porches that pulled us through so many seasons. I think of new friends, of Mosaic, of rebirth, of life, of potential. I think of friends missing: the Wee One, Phil, Bwack, Moxi . . . even David and Brooke and Swell. How can so many years of living make me only 27?

My bed is officially in Sabrina's spare bedroom. It has clean sheets and blankets. I will sleep here tonight. My life's collection is relocated to the Eades' garage and in Olivia's bedroom. The babies are in Waco, re-adjusting to life with Diablo, Lily and now Barley.

No word on the job front so I help friends manage their lives: sweeping drywall, cleaning porches, making beds.

And I guess life is beautiful - messy, unpredictable and often irritating, but peaceful sometimes too.