Tuesday, April 04, 2006

my culinary genius is back.

i can hear you groaning and i'm not even going to hollar at you.

so what i did now... i was just trying to defrost some banana bread that i found in the freezer at work...

i put it on a plastic platter, put it in the microwave and hit the defrost button. i returned to my office to listen for the ding.

then i heard something that made me think i was back in my bedroom at my house in high school. in this re-occuring scenario my dad yells from his easy chair "something's burning" and i hear my mom go running downstairs saying "shit. shit. shit." except this time, it was the music minister giving the alert and it was me who began flying spirited in step and speech to the kitchen.

now the "kitchen" consists of a fridge and two microwaves which sit in our paper supply and copy office. it was full of smoke.

i stopped the microwave and started coughing. i've never smelt anything like that before.

it still stinks today. after five hours of high tech fans sucking air out of the copy room, hallways and offices, after five or six rounds of spraying freshener to distill the smell, after leaving the doors to our office complex open the whole rest of the day, it still stinks. and needless to say, i haven't heard the end of it.

the worst part: the banana bread was unsalvagable and i was still starving.

i also burnt a hole through the plate i used.

as janet says "that plate ain't worth 2 cents now... and it used to be worth a nickel!"

at least no one's mad.

actually they laughed (and coughed) all afternoon.

and we all stunk. all 10 staff members will be taking the clothes they wore yesterday to the cleaners. gross.

also, i've been banned from the kitchen. roger's secretary said anything i need from now on, i can ask her for.


i thought i was getting better.

i can make mac n cheese now without burning myself. i can load a diswasher with the proper soap now and not cause it to ooze bubbles for two hours. i've really cleaned up my act with regard to cooking. i even throw an ocasional dinner party.

but this was a set-back. i admit it.

my head hung a little lower yesterday.

but that might of been cuase i was ducking the smoke...


jenA said...

god almighty. how long did you set the defrost for? Sometimes, I hold down the button too long and set the microwave for something like 20 minutes instead of 2.
I'm sure that's what happened with your banana bread.

lynnette said...

i believe the defrost button is for meat, which takes significantly more power and time to thaw than bread.

glad to hear you're up to your old tricks. they make me laugh.


cat said...

you never cease to make me laugh. oh the things this story brought back up in my memory. my favorite has to be the dishwasher though. i thought the bubbles would never end. just like little betty crocker :)

Anonymous said...

thanks for the mental note ... always cook for ann ... never let her cook for you (especially in your house)! good news is at least you didn't burn the church down!